We are back at it.

Younger Boy had baseball this morning.  He played first base and pitcher.  He accidentally hit someone with a pitch and he felt HORRIBLE.  They didn't win the game.

Middle Boy had therapy.  Younger Boy slept in the car during the therapy.  He usually plays with his Nintendo DS or phone, but he is exhausted.  Sometime during the week he developed a cough and it seems to be getting worse.

The boys watched movies this afternoon while I took a much needed nap.

We went to a japanese steakhouse for dinner to celebrate Younger Boy's birthday.  Neither boy had ever been to a place like that and they loved it.  Younger Boy had a grin from ear to ear.  Middle Boy is much more cool acting.

Younger Boy fell asleep in the car on the way home.  Middle Boy listened to music for a little while and then went to sleep.

It was kind of a long day.  Behaviors were ok...not great.  I guess it was a welcome home for me.

When I went to pick up the boys they were swimming at the neighbor's of C's parents.

C's mom commented that Younger Boy was so antsy for me to be home.  Middle Boy was really trying to play it cool.

The boys were completely exhausted.  We all went to bed early for some much needed sleep.

Sunday - I had an amazing time riding out to camp with A, H, and J.  We were having so much fun we missed our exit on the interstate by TWENTY MILES.  This was going to be the first year we were there BEFORE the scheduled time.  We got set up and ready for kiddos to arrive.

Monday - Campers arrived.  So many LITTLE kiddos.  So many beautiful faces.  Some scared, all excited.  At that moment I remembered what I loved about camp.

Tuesday - Starting to develop relationships with kiddos.  My favorite little girl, C, is back.  She is NOT a morning person.  She is smart and she is funny.  She is an observer.  Unlike everyone else in the cabin you can count on C to be where she should be doing what she is supposed to do.

Wednesday - Not too bad tonight.  A nightmare in our girls cabin about 15 minutes after bedrime kept us up late.  M and S had something of an altercation that day in the pool and M was convinced S was going to drown her the next day while swimming.  She was so tired she talked about everything else she could think of and asked to go home.  About five minutes later she was apologizing over and over for asking to go home and crying hysterically saying she didn't mean it.

Thursday - What a long night.  C was the only girl physically in the cabin.  The other three were all off trying to run away.  Thursday night is always tough because the kiddos are thinking about going home.  I helped the camp therapist chase S, while J and A chased M, and L was with the nurses.  It was CRAZY.  We finally got everyone into the cabin (with the help of M, the director) about an hour after they should have been there.

Friday - It was the day we came home.  It was also the day we learned that C's mom had been evicted while they were gone and they would be going home to a shelter.  My heart is BROKEN.

All week I reflected on whether or not I am going to go back to camp.  Whether I should have even bothered this year.  I spent the entire week feeling unengaged, yet completely unable to do anything about it.  It was frustrating and made me sad.  I really wanted it to be an awesome experience, but it wasn't.  It was hard. 

I realized while I was gone that my faith is shaken.  I am tired and I am angry.  I am cutting off relationships left and right.  Maybe that was why I was supposed to be there, but I sure don't feel like I made any kind of difference.

It was chaotic the two days before I left for camp.  Really chaotic.  We worked on the house and packing for camp.  We got the house semi-presentable.  Not great, but not horrible.

C had to come get the boys to take them to her house, because I was running late.  What an amazing friend!!

I was super stressed out and truly contemplating not going to camp.  I went in completely exhausted and it didn't get better.

Tonight we had dinner with another family from church.  This family has four kiddos they adopted out of the foster care system and are through the same agency as we are.

It was so good to hang out with them.  The kids had a good time.  They have two teen boys and an elementary school boy and girl.

They have a lot of the same issues as we have, but they also have some we don't.  I'm sure the same is true for them.

They have two kiddos who can't play outside unsupervised, because they will just open the door and go in neighbors houses without asking or knocking.  They also have trouble with stealing with two of their kiddos. 

I thought it was interesting that their eighth grader tells them he will get good grades in high school, because eighth grade isn't important.  It is the EXACT same thing Middle Boy says.

They also don't have any kiddos who accept any accountability for anything.  I totally get that.

We are going to get together again soon.

Praises for a good support system!!

I KNEW this colored gel thing would somehow come back to bite me.

It has to be applied to DRY hair.  I reminded Middle Boy OVER and OVER last night that if he put it in his hair in the morning and didn't like it there would NOT be time to shower AGAIN to remove the gel.

All the while getting ready he kept yelling to me...this is not turning my hair white.  It is not going to.  Finally I had to say, "What do you want me to do?  I did NOT manufacture the hair gel!"

Shower again.  Good thing I am working from home today so I wasn't late for anything.

Goodness...no more hair gel practice EXCEPT on weekends!!

The boys got MUCH NEEDED haircuts tonight.

Middle Boy just got his trimmed.  It was really starting to curl up, but only on one side.  It looks a lot better now.

Younger Boy wanted the haircut the boy before him got.  It was basically a buzz cut, but had the hair a bit longer on top.  We needed to blend in the bald spot from the silly putty incident, too.  He and I talked about how if he gets a buzz cut people will be able to see the scar on his head.  It starts at his hairline in the front and goes all the way past the crown of his head and about an inch down the back.  It is the result of something that happened to him as a toddler in his biological home.  I told him people will ask about that scar if it is visible.  We decided to just cut it short and when trim it until the scar was just starting to show.  Felix, the guy doing the cutting, was very patient and helpful.

While we were there Felix kept talking about colored gels.  Thanks a lot Felix.   So we ended up with a $5 package of samples of white, gold, red, green, and blue gels.  We had red last year, but I threw it away after Older Boy put so much in his hair that it looked like his hair was BLEEDING.

I love the new haircuts.  More importantly the boys love the new haircuts.

Praises for a patient hair dresser.