Sunday - I had an amazing time riding out to camp with A, H, and J. We were having so much fun we missed our exit on the interstate by TWENTY MILES. This was going to be the first year we were there BEFORE the scheduled time. We got set up and ready for kiddos to arrive.
Monday - Campers arrived. So many LITTLE kiddos. So many beautiful faces. Some scared, all excited. At that moment I remembered what I loved about camp.
Tuesday - Starting to develop relationships with kiddos. My favorite little girl, C, is back. She is NOT a morning person. She is smart and she is funny. She is an observer. Unlike everyone else in the cabin you can count on C to be where she should be doing what she is supposed to do.
Wednesday - Not too bad tonight. A nightmare in our girls cabin about 15 minutes after bedrime kept us up late. M and S had something of an altercation that day in the pool and M was convinced S was going to drown her the next day while swimming. She was so tired she talked about everything else she could think of and asked to go home. About five minutes later she was apologizing over and over for asking to go home and crying hysterically saying she didn't mean it.
Thursday - What a long night. C was the only girl physically in the cabin. The other three were all off trying to run away. Thursday night is always tough because the kiddos are thinking about going home. I helped the camp therapist chase S, while J and A chased M, and L was with the nurses. It was CRAZY. We finally got everyone into the cabin (with the help of M, the director) about an hour after they should have been there.
Friday - It was the day we came home. It was also the day we learned that C's mom had been evicted while they were gone and they would be going home to a shelter. My heart is BROKEN.
All week I reflected on whether or not I am going to go back to camp. Whether I should have even bothered this year. I spent the entire week feeling unengaged, yet completely unable to do anything about it. It was frustrating and made me sad. I really wanted it to be an awesome experience, but it wasn't. It was hard.
I realized while I was gone that my faith is shaken. I am tired and I am angry. I am cutting off relationships left and right. Maybe that was why I was supposed to be there, but I sure don't feel like I made any kind of difference.
Monday - Campers arrived. So many LITTLE kiddos. So many beautiful faces. Some scared, all excited. At that moment I remembered what I loved about camp.
Tuesday - Starting to develop relationships with kiddos. My favorite little girl, C, is back. She is NOT a morning person. She is smart and she is funny. She is an observer. Unlike everyone else in the cabin you can count on C to be where she should be doing what she is supposed to do.
Wednesday - Not too bad tonight. A nightmare in our girls cabin about 15 minutes after bedrime kept us up late. M and S had something of an altercation that day in the pool and M was convinced S was going to drown her the next day while swimming. She was so tired she talked about everything else she could think of and asked to go home. About five minutes later she was apologizing over and over for asking to go home and crying hysterically saying she didn't mean it.
Thursday - What a long night. C was the only girl physically in the cabin. The other three were all off trying to run away. Thursday night is always tough because the kiddos are thinking about going home. I helped the camp therapist chase S, while J and A chased M, and L was with the nurses. It was CRAZY. We finally got everyone into the cabin (with the help of M, the director) about an hour after they should have been there.
Friday - It was the day we came home. It was also the day we learned that C's mom had been evicted while they were gone and they would be going home to a shelter. My heart is BROKEN.
All week I reflected on whether or not I am going to go back to camp. Whether I should have even bothered this year. I spent the entire week feeling unengaged, yet completely unable to do anything about it. It was frustrating and made me sad. I really wanted it to be an awesome experience, but it wasn't. It was hard.
I realized while I was gone that my faith is shaken. I am tired and I am angry. I am cutting off relationships left and right. Maybe that was why I was supposed to be there, but I sure don't feel like I made any kind of difference.
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