As of noon today it is official.  I am the person in the family attending the most therapy.

I go to two hours a week with Younger Boy, one hour a week with Middle Boy, and an hour a week by myself.  I am learning SO MUCH.  My hour today was so helpful to me.  It is through my foster care agency and it is basically helping to get through the emotional roller coaster of being a foster parent and being part of the system.

We analyzed a lot of the things the boys say to me which are hurtful.  We tried to figure out what they are trying to tell me so that I can see it from a different perspective.  For the most part I am really good at knowing it isn't me they are angry at and they actually think I am a good parent.  When they lash out it is their fear of abandonment coming out.  That doesn't mean it doesn't hurt sometimes.

I am so thankful they are offering this service.  It is such a blessing to me.