This morning I was finally able to just let all of the frustrations and anger go this morning and I cried and cried.

There are so many things.

I have been grieving the life that I feel like I used to have.

I have been really angry at Middle Boy, because I feel like he is so unappreciative of everything. I selfishly am mad at him, because I stuck by him and love him and hired him an attorney and he has been nothing but disrespectful since he got home.

I am frustrated because I feel like Mentor R oversteps his bounds. I am not unappreciative of the help, but I am the parent...not him.

Most of the last couple of months have been spent feeling like a complete failure. Even though things are going well at work I could be doing better...a lot better. My relationship with the boys has been HORRIBLE. I have ignored commitments, because I just couldn't make myself do them. Every time I look at my house I am infuriated by it...it is messy and damaged.

It seems like I have let nearly every friendship fall by the wayside and I am lonely.

As I sat and cried Sophie licked all of my tears and whined. It was good to have her here. I never thought I would say that about a dog.