The second half of the FACT class on Saturday was about making connections through play.

Why is Play Important?

1. It improves the child's cognitive and emotional development.
2. It teaches cooperation.
3. It teaches coordination.
4. Children express their emotions, conquer their fears, and work out their problems through play.
5. Play teaches children how to enjoy life, have fun and experience pleasure in a healthy way!
6. During play, children practice communication skills.
7. It develops imagination and creativity.
8. It increases confidence to meet challenges.
9. Children learn about their world through play.

Two Types of Toys

True Toys - blocks, dolls, art supplies, dress-up clothes, legos, action figures, toy cars

Passive Toys/Entertainment - game systems, computer games, DVDs, TV

True toys allow children to exercise their imagination.  True toys engage children in relationship with their world.

When Play is Disrupted Through Trauma

1. Neglected and traumatized children may not have had the opportunity to play so their play is stunted.  This affects their brain development.
2. They may not know how to play either independently or with others and some lose the ability to participate in imaginative play.
3. Their play my look like the play of a much younger child.  It is important to look at the developmental "play" level of the child and provide and ALLOW toys at that level.
4. Their play may look violent and scary, because that is what they know.
5. Their play will have short spans with five minutes at each type of play before moving on.
6. the child may be extremely bossy and controlling in play.

Parent Participation is a MUST!!

1. Play is a gentle way to enhance the relationship.
2. The parent gets a window into the child's world, the child's imagination, thinking, and emotions.
3. The child feels fully connected to the parent who is fully present during play.

Play and Laughter

1. Laughter activates care and thinking centers in the brain.
2. It reduces levels of stress hormones.
3. It is a physical and emotional release.
4. It leads to closer connections.

How to Play with Your Child

1. Meet the child at his emotional and developmental level.
2. Choose something you and your child both enjoy.
3. Stay positive and relaxed.
4. Demonstrate interest in what your child is doing.
5. Follow his lead.  Join in, but don't "take over" or "take control".
6. Avoid teaching during play.  It is child directed.

Admittedly I DO NOT do a good job of playing with either boy.  The times I remember the most are when Middle Boy was in the juvenile center and we would sit and play dominoes or cards for the entire hour while we just chatted.  Occassionally we will play board games or shoot baskets or play catch, but not often enough.  I think this needs to be one of my MAJOR goals.

Prayers for wisdom on the appropriate types of play with each boy and for laughter in our home.