Older Boy and Younger Boy in the same room is like having gas and fire. Neither one can enter a room where the other is and not make a snide comment or throw something or kick them or something of that nature.
Tonight Older Boy had therapy with Therapist J. We were still eating dinner when he got there. Middle Boy was grilling hot dogs with the help of Younger Boy. Older Boy wanted more hot dogs. He had already had four. Younger Boy had one and there were three left. Therapist J watched as Younger Boy took the two that were least black and left the third for Older Boy. He also watched Older Boy scream that Younger Boy did it on purpose. It resulted in Older Boy calling Younger Boy a profane name and flipping him off. It was a built in therapy session for Therapist J. They talked about the appropriateness of his response. Older Boy ended up eating all of the hot dogs, because Younger Boy was tired of the yelling. It didn't come without Younger Boy screaming about Older Boy always getting his way and Older Boy screaming about how everyone always sides with Younger Boy.
After the session Therapist J and I talked for a while about the relationship between the two. He commented that he had never seen them act like they liked each other or heard either say anything about being brothers and caring. He has certainly seen the ugly side of their relationship. His observation is both of them will have trouble dealing with their issues when the other is constantly there igniting a spark of behavior.
We didn't set up therapy for next week, because we aren't sure Older Boy will still be there. Ironically I will kind of miss Therapist J.
Prayers that one day Older Boy and Younger Boy will be able to have a healthy relationship and be able to recognize their current life situation has nothing to do with the behaviors or actions of the other. Prayers they will one day realize that all of the anger they are holding inside is not healthy or productive.
Tonight Older Boy had therapy with Therapist J. We were still eating dinner when he got there. Middle Boy was grilling hot dogs with the help of Younger Boy. Older Boy wanted more hot dogs. He had already had four. Younger Boy had one and there were three left. Therapist J watched as Younger Boy took the two that were least black and left the third for Older Boy. He also watched Older Boy scream that Younger Boy did it on purpose. It resulted in Older Boy calling Younger Boy a profane name and flipping him off. It was a built in therapy session for Therapist J. They talked about the appropriateness of his response. Older Boy ended up eating all of the hot dogs, because Younger Boy was tired of the yelling. It didn't come without Younger Boy screaming about Older Boy always getting his way and Older Boy screaming about how everyone always sides with Younger Boy.
After the session Therapist J and I talked for a while about the relationship between the two. He commented that he had never seen them act like they liked each other or heard either say anything about being brothers and caring. He has certainly seen the ugly side of their relationship. His observation is both of them will have trouble dealing with their issues when the other is constantly there igniting a spark of behavior.
We didn't set up therapy for next week, because we aren't sure Older Boy will still be there. Ironically I will kind of miss Therapist J.
Prayers that one day Older Boy and Younger Boy will be able to have a healthy relationship and be able to recognize their current life situation has nothing to do with the behaviors or actions of the other. Prayers they will one day realize that all of the anger they are holding inside is not healthy or productive.
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